We write Soul Contracts with people to support us so your “mother” who may be an adoptive parent, an aunt or grandmother who raised you. Or possibly a beloved woman of no biological relation, who holds that special place in your heart and your life. Unbeknownst to me, the personality, I wrote soul contracts to be the mother to four souls and since I hadn’t really planned on having more that two children, they all had to “get into my life” somehow. Our son was only 18 months old when his twin sisters were born and our nephew joined our family. We consider him our fourth child, and he sees himself as our son, with our kids his siblings.
Beyond Family of Origin
This is an example of a soul contract with family members other than
the birth parents.
You may think that picking your family meant you contracted with
your whole family, or at least with your parents. Actually, that isn’t
how it works in the bigger picture of the Akashic realm. Whether we
were raised in our genetic family of origin, adopted, or were part of a
blended family, there are many, many different reasons for our
Most of the time you will have soul contracts with some members of
your family, but not with others. You may have picked a family to be
with your brother, your aunt, or your grandmother, but not your
parents. I’ve heard many people say that there must have been a
mistake: “This can’t possibly be my family!”
Learning to Mother Yourself
Whatever the nature of their soul contract, for some people Mother’s
Day isn’t a happy time: they were never mothered, or lost their
mother figure early on. How, then, can we reconcile this annual
celebration with such a deep sense of loss and longing?
Self-love — and self-mothering — are key.
As women, we’re typically raised to put others first. Thinking about our
own needs or asking for what we want is deemed selfish, even in this
age of rising consciousness. As a result, many women become
caretakers for their partners, parents, children, friends, colleagues,
and even strangers, only remembering that they have neglected their
own needs when they’re verging on exhaustion.
The same holds true for men. Even though, societally, men are
frequently encouraged to “look out for number one”, a lack of
mothering can mean a man has no sense of his softer side and may,
therefore, also lack the ability for self-care, relying on the women in
his life to provide nurturing, yet being unaware that he can learn how
to mother himself.
Are You Wringing Out the Moss?
When you are emotionally and physically depleted, it’s exponentially
more difficult to mother anyone else — including yourself. And as odd
as it might sound, especially for a woman accustomed to putting
herself last, mothering yourself enables you to replenish your inner
wells, so you have more to give others, not less. Remember the
airplane advice: in an emergency, put your own oxygen mask on first.
In this era of mandated mask wearing, we might at last heed the
Self-mothering begins by recognizing how you’re feeling at any given
moment, not waiting until you’re out of energy, wringing out the moss
at the bottom of the well, to begin paying attention to your own needs.
The woman who filled the role of “mother” in your soul contract
hopefully did not wait until you were starving to feed you. The same
holds true for psychic sustenance. You need to feed yourself
emotionally and spiritually long before your well runs dry.
The Four 4 E’s (Ease) for Self-Mothering
1. Eating well. Do you tend to grab something on the go because
you’re so busy working or tending to family there’s no time left
to think about food? Your body will eventually let you know this
is not sustainable. Make the conscious choice to shop for,
prepare, and enjoy a healthy, nourishing meal. Start with once a
week, and gradually add meals until you are eating a healthful
homemade meal at least five times a week, ideally at
dinnertime. Your body, mind, and spirit will thank you
2. Enough sleep. Do you skimp on sleep in order to “get more
done”? That’s a fallacy; you will be far more productive when
you’re well rested than by trying to cram more activities into a
weary being. You know instinctively how much sleep you need to
function at your best. Commit to prioritizing it in your life.
3. Exercise. How do you most enjoy moving your body? Be sure to
choose physical activity that’s fun, not work. If you love to
dance, could you plan a weekly dance outing with friends? Or
just put on some tunes in your living room and dance to your
heart’s content. If you enjoy gardening, this is an excellent
workout — and your plants and flowers will love it, too.
4. Emotional encouragement. Perhaps most crucial of all, start
speaking to yourself with kindness. People’s self-talk can be so
harsh — words they wouldn’t dream of inflicting on another!
Listen to what you say to yourself, and think of what a loving
mother would say. Even if you did not have such a figure in your
life, you can begin to create one on the inner plane now — and
“she” will be with you for the rest of your life.
This prayer will guide you on your journey to self-mothering:
PRAYER OF SELF-LOVE
Mother, Father, Goddess, God, as I now
choose to move from my head,
deeply into my heart, I connect to my love of self.
This sacred room holds the memory of the divine in me.
There is nothing else.
I sit calmly in my heart center and feel
the pervasive energy of the Creator.
I AM that I AM.
If you’d like to dive deeper into your Akashic Records, I’ll be offering
an online teleseminar to teach you how to access your Akashic
Records, from June 8 – June 29, 2021. This virtual course comes with
a wealth of bonuses, including a one-on-one consultation with me, and
a private Facebook group where you’ll meet other like-minded souls to
help deepen your Akashic work.